Becoming the Leader People Want to Follow

Recently, I had the opportunity to speak on one of the biggest stages of my career   on board the Celebrity Edge cruise ship with Business Blueprint. The topic?
"How to Lead People Who Don’t Want to Be Led."

It was a cheeky title, but beneath it was a universal truth:
We’ve all faced resistance.

Whether you’re guiding a toddler, leading a team, or trying to motivate yourself through a difficult season, leadership isn’t about control. It’s about connection. And over the years, I’ve come to believe this:

Leadership isn’t about forcing people to follow.
It’s about becoming someone worth following.

Leading Through Resistance

When I stepped onto that stage, I was honoured   and nervous. The room was full of brilliant entrepreneurs. My goal wasn’t just to deliver a talk. I wanted to offer transformation.

So I told the truth. The real truth.
The behind-the-scenes struggles that shaped me.
From starting a hospitality business without experience,
To raising a neurodiverse son in a school system that didn’t know how to support him.

I shared what it looked like to lead in chaos   not with perfection, but with patience.
Not with control, but with compassion.

Parenting my son Dylan, who has ADHD and ODD, became one of my most powerful leadership lessons. It taught me that effective leadership isn’t loud, it's steady. It’s being; the calm in the storm, even when you don’t feel calm at all.

From Chicken Shops to Cruise Stages

When we launched Vasco’s, our restaurant brand, I had zero hospitality experience.
No training. No safety net. No idea what I was doing.

There were whispers: “She won’t last.”
And honestly, I wondered that too.

But I kept showing up.
I led with heart, not a handbook.
I focused on culture before credentials.

In my keynote, I referenced Ted Lasso, a fictional coach who succeeds not because of technical mastery, but because he believes in people first. That’s the kind of leader I aim to be.

Leadership, I’ve learned, is less about knowing it all, and more about asking better questions. Listening deeply. Enrolling others into a vision that’s bigger than all of us.

From Burnout to Belief

Behind the scenes of all the achievement was another reality: burnout.

I was doing a lot   but I wasn’t aligned.

And burnout, I’ve learned, doesn’t always look like collapse. Sometimes, it’s quiet. It’s a nagging feeling that something’s off. That success without fulfillment is slowly draining you.

What changed for me wasn’t just strategy, it was self-trust.

I stopped winging it.
I prepared.
I trained.
I gave myself permission to show up with intention, not just effort.

That’s when confidence returned.

Because confidence doesn’t appear out of nowhere   it’s what comes after you’ve walked through fear, done the hard things, and kept going anyway.

Resourcefulness Is Your Edge

You don’t need every qualification to lead.
You need resourcefulness.

It’s what I leaned on when I started the business.
It’s what I relied on when parenting felt impossible.
It’s what I bring to the stage every time I speak.

“You’re not starting from scratch. You’re starting from experience.”

That’s what I tell my clients.
Because every pivot, every failure, every hard-won lesson is part of your toolkit now.
It’s what gives you an edge   not just as a business owner, but as a leader.

Forget Perfect. Pursue Progress.

Before that keynote, I had a moment of self-doubt.
“Why did I say yes to this?”

But I reminded myself: I’d done the work. I was ready.

Not perfect, but prepared.

And that’s what matters most.

The feedback I received afterward wasn’t about being flawless. It was about being real. People thanked me for sharing the messy middle, the parts we often hide.

Because that’s what gives others permission to do the same.

Final Thoughts: Lead From the Inside Out

Leadership isn’t about being the loudest voice in the room.

It’s about having the courage to speak your truth   even if your voice shakes.

It’s about building trust, not just with others, but with yourself.

When you lead from that place?
People don’t just follow.
They believe.

Because you’re not asking for perfection.
You’re modelling resilience.
You’re teaching resourcefulness.
You’re showing what’s possible   even when you’re scared.

So if you’re standing on the edge of something new…
Don’t wait to feel ready.
Don’t wait for permission.

Just begin.

Lead from where you are.
And trust that the path will rise to meet you.